One of the reasons I decided to take this road trip was because I would turn 30 along the way. I love birthdays and while I would love to commemorate the next decade of my life with friends and loved ones (and still would — anyone care to come to Napa this weekend?), I thought doing something completely different than the usual would be neat. So here I am. Turning 30 way across the country from my friends and loved ones. Celebrating through Facebook messages, tweets, phone calls and text messages.

I feel like this birthday is more meditative and thoughtful for me and I kind of like that. I’d like to be a little bit more purposeful about my next decade. I spent a lot of my 20s floundering around and being all sorts of messy and reactive and unsure and insecure. And while I don’t doubt that I will make plenty of mistakes in my 30s, I know I will be more secure with those mistakes, more accepting of myself. And that is so refreshing and it fills me with ease and relief. Like my whole soul has just let out a big giant sigh. Freedom. I’m not all the way into this feeling yet, this security, but I think the further I get into my 30s, the stronger that secureness will be. This excites me.

I feel that turning 30 is opening the door to the next chapter, an even better one than the ones so far. And so far, life has been incredibly wonderful. I am grateful for the things I have learned about myself and the world and what really matters. I’m grateful to have been alive for this long. Though I’m not that old, not everyone gets to see this many years. Losing some young and vibrant people I care for has made me see how precious life is. I’m grateful to be here and experience life with its joys and pains. I’m grateful for those I love and those who love me. I’m grateful to have lessons ahead of me, I know they’ll be just what I need when I need it.

So. Here’s to the next decade: more adventures, more mistakes, more laughter, more friendships, more meaning, more love. Cheers.

I am thankful:

• for beautiful mornings in Virginia Beach, VA
• for Isabel, the best dog ever and a being who has taught me so much about myself and life
• for family, and getting to spend time with my brother, sister-in-law and two nephews
• for playing Rock Band with said nephews
• and helping with homework
• to be able to take this road trip and have this experience, for being brave and confident enough to do it
• for wonderful friends
• for nature and all its beauty
• for life

Happy Thanksgiving!

Our first few days in Philadelphia were rainy, but the sun finally came out on Sunday and gave us a beautiful sunset:

Nikkie and I went to this fantastic yoga class where the theme was all about balance. Noticing the differences in how one side of the body feels versus the other side, but also thinking about the balances and imbalances in our lives. I definitely need to pay more attention to life balance. I know that I don’t take enough time to rest, or, when I do, I feel incredibly guilty and that stresses me out, which then nullifies the benefit of that time. I’m all out of whack.

During savasana (final relaxation), our teacher reminded us that resting is just as important as working. And that sometimes, resting can be harder than working! I think she was reading my mind. But it’s true. There’s a counterbalance, a sort of yin and yang, to it. You can’t have work without rest, and vice versa. I’ve gotten into a steady “must be working!” mode, shutting off any idea of rest. This class made me more aware of this imbalance and has brought me closer to examining it. So I think now I will try bring the resting mode into balance more. This is my challenge.

Tomorrow I leave the Red River Gorge. I’ve been here for the past month (minus a weekend and a few days) and have made excellent personal progress climbing. I feel I am just beginning to get the idea of how to live here. Just getting into the flow of here, making friends and forming bonds, and now I have to up and leave. I suppose I should get used to this. This is the next seven months for me: landing somewhere, beginning to figure that somewhere out, then leaving again.

In terms of my time in the Red, I’m sad to leave the wonderful people I’ve met here. Also, I feel I am just beginning to get my climbing legs (like sea legs, but for climbing) and have already accomplished all but one of the goals I set this past spring. Those goals:

• Lead at least five routes. (Done and surpassed.)
• Climb 5.9 routes clean. (Done. Except for the scary one I lead today. Let’s not talk about that.)
• Climb (on toprope) at least five routes in the 5.10a-d range. (Done.)
• Do one pullup. (This is the one goal I did not achieve.)

I’m very excited at my achievements, especially because when I set these goals back in April, I wasn’t sure I’d complete any of them. I thought maybe I’d get to cross off one goal, or half of one. I was just getting myself together mentally for leading, my climbing technique needed serious work (and surely still has far to go), and overall I was still fumbling around. My expectations weren’t that high. Now, I’m amazed at how solid and confident I feel on routes that used to feel scary and difficult. The progress is exciting and exhilarating and remarkable. And now I want to set even higher goals.

But I’m not sure what those goals should be. The rest of the trip will not have me climbing as regularly as this first month. So maybe my goal will be simply to climb as regularly as possible, within the bounds of the everything else I’m doing on this trip. At the very least, I’ve learned that I’m capable of more than I thought, and just learning/knowing that is enough.

Red River Gorge and everyone therein, I will miss you. Thank you for your friendship and for all that you have taught me about myself. I’ll see you soon.